Thursday, September 24, 2015

26 weeks


 I've been a total slacker this summer with blogging!  I have been incredibly busy with a lot of aspects of my life and swear I am going to sit down and write a blog daily and it just doesn't happen.  I have been nose deep in school work for a few weeks.  Compound that with the kids starting back at school as well and going toe to toe with our maintenance company for not getting our issues corrected with the house we moved into 4 months ago.  Today, we are having the HVAC system cleaned finally too.  I actually had to go to the neighbors house because the dust they were cleaning out was making me have coughing fits and watery eyes and a headache!  That was not a lot of fun!

Here are my weekly bump photos I have missed posting!  Next week, we will be in the third trimester!  The first one goes by so slow because of the sickness and the fatigue.  The second trimester FLIES by.  The third trimester creeps by with the hurry up and wait and I feel like a whale feelings!



Next up is the photos from what is going on with this sweet girl and also what is going on with my body.
Baby is definitely looking more like a sweet chubby bay now!


It was too bad that Mom & Dad didn't get to feel their little girl moving while they were here.  Leah & Weston have both been able to feel her moving -- Leah loves watching and feeling her move and groove.  Now it is coming full circle for them and it is much easier for them to understand. 


If we had a 3D scan right now, this is similar to how she would look on the screen!



Finally a few more updates of surrogacy types-- First -- Of course E&L were here for an egg retrieval to make embryos to make this little girl a big sister in the future!  So with that being said, they retrieved 20 eggs on Thursday.  Out of those 20 eggs, 16 eggs were mature and were fertilized.  9 of them became embryos. And 5 of them were frozen with two of them being of exceptional quality. Before they were frozen, they were biopsied and the cells were sent to Florida so the genetic testing could be done!  So wish us/them luck that we have several wonderful embryos to work with in the future!

Also, last Thursday, I was contracting a lot.  I had told my doctor about it the week before but I wasn't necessarily worried about it.  But on Thursday, I was having contractions every 5 minutes all day.  They did not get stronger so again I was not overly worried.  But it is also not my baby! E&L were heading on a plane back to the UK and I wasn't able to ask them what I should do, so I gathered myself up and just ran over to triage.  If it was my own baby, I would have likely just stayed home.  When you add the element of someone else's baby to the mix, suddenly you second guess everything!  The contractions continued when I was laying down or standing.  It continued when I drank a lot of water and when I ate so just to be safe, I went to get checked out.  The gals in triage were great.  They put the monitors on me and low and behold -- I was contracting sometimes every 2-3 minutes.  At least I didn't feel crazy! They checked my urine and also did a speculum exam to visualize the cervical opening.  Everything was closed and I had no infections anywhere which is great.  Essentially what the verdict is, my body is saying 'Hey, lets start training for this marathon we are about to do!' So there it is -- contracting frequently is my new normal!




I still need to post about my daughter's 8th birthday and also my husband's reenlistment ceremony.  It happened on September 11 but I am 2 weeks behind.  9/11 is a big day to Americans -- military families especially but it is an even more special day to our family with it being Leah's birthday too!  Maybe soon, I will remember to post the photos and write about that day!!

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Visit with my Intended Parents!

These last few days have been nothing short of amazing.  Or as E&L would say "Brilliant!" 

First I am going to post a few photos that I am behind on!  My weekly bump photos, then update on what has been going on around here!
At a wedding in one of the few frocks that will fit!

Starting to look more round!

On Thursday I had an OB appointment.  E&L are here in town right now doing her egg retrieval.  Or as my son puts it 'She is laying some eggs!' She is growing a lot of follicles and the cycle is looking favorable -- much like the one that produced this little girl!  I think it is 12 follicles on one ovary and 6 on the other.  As much as this is uncomfortable for her and she does the best she can to relax and just grow those follicles, she came out to an appointment with the Case Manager and together we all got to see Labor and Delivery as well!



With the case manager we got a folder started so that when we are admitted to have this little girl, everyone knows the situation and the process goes smoothly!  We got the outline for a birth plan so that we can all plan this together.  Even though this little girl is coming out of my body, she has been E&L's baby since conception and they need to be a part of the planning from beginning to end and feel part of this process!  I have had my own babies and my own beautiful child births so together, we need to make sure everyone's needs are met with the most of the emphasis being on their desires -- especially after she is born!  They also found and toured a house that they will rent short term when they are here for the delivery and the legal process after the birth that is quite close by. 



Saturday was L's birthday and I vowed to make it as special as I could! I was able to secure an appointment with a 3D ultrasound place when all of the others were not available or canceled on us last minute!  But first, we had brunch with them!  Time just seems to pass too quickly whenever we are with them.  They came over at 10 am and I had brunch set up. I was so nervous about cooking for them -- what do you make for brunch for people who are from the UK?  I made a farmer's casserole, lemon blueberry pound cake and fruit salad and of course, I had some English Breakfast tea on hand!  I was also nervous if .. I would be enough.  I struggle with this often (if you are a FB friend you know this!) Is my house clean enough?  Will my kids be good enough when they are around?  But I am certain, if I served them a bowl of cereal, they would have been content! 


After brunch L disappeared for a bit with Leah and they played in her room.  My kids just adored the two of them and this was the first time they got to meet each other. This is an important part of the journey as my kids have been here every step of the way and finally, they are able to wrap their mind around the idea of giving this baby to other people because now they have met them! So in the freezer, I had bought an ice cream cake because Friday, it was Leah's birthday so we were having a dual celebration!  We call Leah & L down and served them the ice cream cake with candles lit -- together they blew out the candles and made wishes!  I have no doubt that their wishes were completely different but equally beautiful.
















When I was in Michigan a few months back, I picked up two different items for L's birthday knowing she would be here during that time frame.  They just seemed to really talk to me when I saw them. Of course this one is self explanatory!


This one may not be quite as quick to understand --Christopher Robin said this quote to Pooh Bear.  When I saw it, I thought it was perfect.  It was just the right sentiments.   I often hear 'Wow, what you are doing is amazing' but to me, the IM's and IF's are far more amazing.  They are so brave to go through this journey.  So much stronger -- emotionally and physically-- to do this.  I cannot imagine being on that side of the team but they have my utmost respect.  What my IM has had to go through to become a mother, I will always respect her and look up to her.  It is simply amazing! I say it often, and I will say it again, but I am truly blessed to work with them!! 


I also gave her a few new charms to go in her origami owl necklace but forgot to photograph them -- a silver heart with pink foot prints and also a little thing of fingernail polish, a teacup and a little suitcase since they are traveling back and forth so much. 

After that, they gave little gifts to my children from England.  Fun things like coloring books and play-doh and legos!






After that, we relaxed for a bit then headed to Fredericksburg. Its of course raining here and traffic was atrocious!  We left 45 minutes early and still got there 5 minutes late.  But we made it there and this place was wonderful.  The owner had set up this appointment for us knowing the trials and tribulations we had trying to make the appointment and said she would have figured out a way to get us in no matter what.  Her customer service was excellent and she was so warm and inviting! She was just so favorable of our situation -- if you ever need a place to get a 3D ultrasound while in the Northern VA area -- check out this business Sneak a Peek


Little girl decided to be a bit camera shy and between having her knees in her face and her hands around her face, we never got a really clear shot without a open hand or a fisted hand in the view!  I turned this way and that way and my IPs never sat down -- they stood right there beside the large screen on the wall and they were just in awe.  It suddenly became real that their little baby was indeed a baby in full form and has all of her parts.  These parts included a long second toe just like her daddy (this is a genetic trait), and a pronounced nose and chin like mum.  One other thing that she supposedly takes after her mum is that she is stubborn according to daddy, but I've never seen that trait :)  They also have a video but I have to get my friend to crop out the name on the top corner before I can post it later this week but I will post this 25 minute video so everyone can see teacup in real time!









It was really surreal to see the happiness of someone else in the same room and feel the emotional connection to them -- but not the baby!  Surrogacy is such an interesting situation with such emotions that you will never see anywhere else. 

After the scan we drove back home took some group photos with my children photo bombing but you can definitely see how fun and loving and excited E&L are.  They were simply wonderful with my children and myself.  I just cannot think of a better couple to be working with through this journey!  They most definitely embrace me and my family with all of our quirks!







We have a list of things we are working on as a team--  birth plans, pediatricians, baby gear that is necessary to bring or if I can let them borrow it while they are here -- just working through logistics stuff.  I asked if they wanted to write anything to add to the blog. I haven't done this yet because I didn't want anyone to feel pressured to write something but after such a big milestone, I thought maybe they would have something to say.  My IF emailed me this morning with this... its perfect.  All of it!

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What do you say when you see your daughter for the first time? In my case it was "Are those feet?" And indeed they were. Beautiful feet, attached to long skinny legs, and a big round body, containing a loudly beating heart. Also a roundish head with a pointy chin, and long skinny arms and even longer fingers. All curled up in a ball, and somewhat bashful about appearing in 3D on a widescreen TV in Virginia, three months before she had intended to be posing for her first photographs.

What do you say to the woman carrying your daughter, when you see that daughter for the first time? In our case it was, "Thank you. Again." And not just for organising the scan, and getting us there on time, despite the rain and the traffic, or for hosting brunch at your beautiful home, where we got to meet your fabulous children, each everything you had said they were, and more so, but for everything. Because yesterday, and possibly for the first time, L & I fully and completely understood that we will be having a child, and that having a child is everything.

We are on a journey. L & I, Melanie, Melanie's family, and our daughter. It's a fantastic journey, and our destination, which not so long ago had seemed so far away as to be out of sight, is now not so far down the road.

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Finally in closing -- we (my family) went for a little nature walk today since the weather was so beautiful -- my kids really enjoyed checking out this local gem and spending time in the woods along the river.













Time to check out my bed.  We are now on OB appointments every 3-4 weeks so the next one is September 30.  I have been having a ton of Braxton Hicks contractions and the doctor wants to keep her eye on my blood pressure because IVF/Different Father's genetics can cause pre-eclampsia even in women who had completely unremarkable pregnancies before.  My uterus was measuring 28 weeks at 23w6d too!  Not sure if shes going to be a big baby or she was just in a funny position!  Lots going on -- I cant believe that soon, we will be in double digit days until delivery, if we aren't already!

Until next time....