Just a girl and her Tums

That is where I am right now -- eating Tums every night.  Tonight it is especially a staple because we had spaghetti sauce with dinner.  Heartburn hell!  With a big fat side of nausea.  I thought as the first trimester hustled out, the nausea would too... but not quite yet.

This little whiny session made me think about things.  To put things into perspective a little bit.  I was also thinking about this last night as I was trying to go to bed.  I hear it all of the time, things that are meant to be nice but are so flippant with the feelings of IPs.  It is things like 'At least you don't have to ruin your body for a pregnancy.' or 'At least you get to skip all of the pregnancy woes like morning sickness when you use a surrogate'.  These are just a couple of the emotional type arguments that I hear people trying to make the IPs feel better about using a surrogate... I won't even get into the argument about how much IPs have to spend to facilitate a surrogate pregnancy plus all of the professionals involved too.

As I was laying to go to sleep last night, the little teacup was stirring.  I wish more than anything that my IM could feel this, in her own belly.  She has a lifetime with this baby once s/he is born  (me and IM are on team girl for the record!), but still, as amazing as it is to be someone's surrogate, I wish there wasn't a need.  I know that if it was physically possible, she would go through illness, the body changes, the hormonal messes to be able to carry her own baby, that she would love to feel her husband's hand on her belly as the baby moves.  I feel a sense of guilt that I am the one that experience this 9 months that leads up to her motherhood.  I shouldn't feel guilty, but I so desperately wish that it didn't have to be this way! I love that I can help, but I wish there was not a need for me.  Such conflicting emotions and so hard to articulate them! I also see the struggle daily with other friends who are also TTC and having problems.  I just wish there was a magic wand to help everyone who struggles with this.  I know that every baby that comes to a mother or father is special -- no matter the journey in which the baby got to you is through surrogacy, donor eggs/sperm/embryos, adoption or just years and years of trying--  even if the journey is cut short... Everyone who faces these struggles -- you are in my heart and on my mind often!

I think what brought these emotions on was that E&L sent me photos of them with a good friend's brand new baby.  This baby was brought into this world through the help of Dr. Levy as well and his IVF program.  I wish I could share the photos of E&L, but having someone's baby in the photo\ I cannot share!  But I have to tell you, this sweet little baby boy is gorgeous and E&L look so happy and comfortable snuggling with him.  I think it is amazing that they have friends that artificial reproduction has helped create their family -- it creates a bond between two couples that cannot be understood by anyone else unless they too have been down the same road.  But soon, in a few short months, E&L will get to share their baby with their friends in the same manner!  That is the feeling I am excited for-- that they will finally get to be a family with their baby.

With the photos of my IPs and that sweet little guy, my IM sent me a photo of her and her dad in a sporty little convertible.  The grandpa to be said hello to me and L passed it on so 'Hello Grandpa!' (Or whatever you guys call gramps in the UK!!)  It is so nice to feel connected to people so far away, I think of all of the family member and friends across the sea often! I know you guys are getting excited -- so I will do my best to do timely updates! 

Welcome to 13 weeks and Welcome to the Neighborhood!

So it has been 3 weeks since I updated the blog -- which isn't like me -- but we have been really busy with the move.  The move from hell... But more about that later -- first up, info about the pregnancy!

Today we are 13 weeks pregnant -- this means that next wee, we will be in the second trimester!  by the end of this week, we will be about 33% done with the pregnancy.  It is flying by!

My IM said she shared this photo with co-workers -- I will be sure to dress up next Hump Day Bump Day photo :)  Look like I get out of tanks and yoga pants at least.  But there it is, it is starting to poke out a bit!

Baby is definitely looking more a like a human and less like a sea creature now!

So apparently by the end of this week, the nausea should pretty much be subsiding but that is totally a lie!  This morning was ROUGH!  Being at home with 3 kiddos during the summer while moving was something I grossly underestimated!  My kids have missed the memo that it is summer and that they should sleep in -- Weston & Piper are taking turns waking during the 5 o'clock hour. I am still so desperate for sleep.  We have been here for just over two weeks and it has been late nights, early mornings and I feel like my sleep bank is constantly in debt. 

The sickness from pregnancy was killer during the move.  While in NC still, we stayed at a hotel. On the way out of the door to move here, Kurt was changing Piper's diaper and that sent me for the toilet... er I mean sink at the hotel because the bathroom was taken.  I used the kitchenette sink and the garbage disposal didn't work so I had to manually clear that mess.  YUCK!  Then we ate junk for a week straight while moving, staying in hotels, and getting the kitchen set up.  I was surprised to see that I had lost weight but the amount of getting sick in those two weeks actually totaled more than the first 11 weeks combined!  The other night, I hit an all time nausea low.  We were eating dinner and we had pasta with dinner.  Weston (my 5 year old) was drinking a root beer in a bottle.  He took a swig and set it down and I looked over and saw all of these floaters in it and he didn't care.  I started heaving immediately.  It was funny so I was laughing and heaving but man-- just visual images make me heave now too?! 

Next onto some info about our move.  I will try to keep this short and sweet, but I rarely do. This will be VERY picture heavy.  Fair warning there! 


I could write a book about "whatever could go wrong, will go wrong in a DITY move" meaning a military do it yourself move.  So I won't tell it all but we had major fiascoes on the other end on the way out of town with moving trucks and other messes.  We couldn't fit everything in the truck so we gave stuff away and threw stuff out. 

We get up here, unload the first moving truck then go to get the rest of our stuff out of storage to find out that the storage unit leaked bad and destroyed 30% of our unit.  Here are some photos to show how badly the items were damaged from water/mold/mildew damage

Curtains

Curtains

Ottoman to go to an over-sized chair

I called USAA (our rental insurance) and they won't cover this type of water damage-- they cover some, but not this type.  So I called the storage unit's insurance and we are in the middle of a claim. I am still unsure if they will cover the damage.  The cost of the damaged items totaled more than $2500.  I sent in an itemized list of the damage and also photos so I am hoping they come through.  The owner of the storage unit (that we paid $300 a month for!) wasn't concerned and didn't even apologize.  Just brushed us off and told us he would have maintenance look at it.

Here are some photos of our house pretty well set up but remember, this is a work in progress -- I still have boxes to unpack, furniture to move, and move again, cords to tuck away.  So It will give you an idea of our house!  You can definitely tell that it is smaller than our last house, but I do love this house and its character.  The house is 85 years old and has a lot of character but it has been upgraded in many ways so it still has a new feel where it is necessary (like the kitchens and bathrooms!)

Front of house

Back of house from the corner of the garage

Weston on the stairs

Kitchen

Kitchen

Pantry and stairway to basement

Dining room -- and that house across the street-- that would be my best friend here -- I met her months before we moved here.  There isn't a day that goes by that I am not at her house, she is not at our house or our kids aren't running back and forth between the houses

Front room -- Cords over fireplace need to be hidden still.

Front Room -- Wood Burning fireplace

Family room

New IKEA book case!

You caught me watching HGTV.  Love that channel!

Powder Room

Master Bathroom

Master bathroom -- the character I speak of is evident in this room, I had to put shims under the cabinet so t would stop leaning on the wall because the floors slope so bad!

This is not a great photo because my room was a mess. But this is how small the master bedroom is!  You can see each side in the photo.  It is TINY!

Piper's Room

Piper's Room

Piper's Gnome Closet (One closet is short with no bars in it in her room, and one is tall with a clothing rack)

Weston's room not decorated yet

Weston's room still being decorated

Weston's gnome closet

Leah's Room

Leah's room

Leah's room  -- And my Aunt Jill who came and helped me unpack for 2 days!

Stairway down to basement

We will call this "Basement Before"

Basement before

 Saturday night, we had a little storm roll through.  It was the remnants of a tropical storm and rain poured, and poured, and poured.  In a short period of time, the rain got so bad that our basement flooded.  Bad.  It was a culmination of many different things but we had 6 different places that water was coming in through. The worst were the floor drains that are attached to nothing but storm drains.  Eventually, water was just fountaining into our basement at a high rate of speed.

Basement during

Mud started coming up through the floor drains

The next morning -- this is so filthy!

Water pouring in between two walls at the rate of a gallon per minute

Underneath the stairs -- the stuff we couldn't catch in a bucket

Some places had several feet of water flooded due to storm drains that could not handle the rate that the rain was coming down.  Water came in our garage too.

Several inches of water on our patio pouring into our basement.

The storm that caused the damage

Since it is getting late and I need to go to bed, we will just leave this with 'Welcome to the neighborhood!'   They are still in the process of fixing the problems and cleaning our basement.  As of right now, we still have a lot of water and mud in the basement.  UGH!!!!!

Just a tiny little update

I am still waist deep in boxes that we are unpacking.  We made it here with a few hiccups along the way!  I can report that I have felt the baby tapping around in there occasionally when I am very still (which hasn't been often in the last week).  The sickness still hasn't subsided.  I somehow lost 2 lbs with our move (probably with the constant moving all day long) even with eating junk/fast food for a week!  I will post a better and more comprehensive update when I get my house organized enough to take photos.   During all of this, I am working on getting established in the local hospital/network of providers here at the new base so we can resume OB care ASAP.

(I also use exclamation points too much so I had to go back and edit and take out a few.  What can I say?  I guess that means I am excited about this.)

And we are 12 weeks now  -- hooray!  Next week we will be reaching the second trimester -- hopefully the pukies leave with the first trimester!

Second Ultrasound was Today!

Hello followers!

Today we had our second ultrasound.  We are currently 9w4d pregnant and this glorious ultrasound was not only to see the baby moving and grooving but also to officially wean from those meds!

Without further ado -- here are some photos of the baby that is growing quite well.  I got to see the little legs and arms moving!  I wish I was able to record it for my IPs but I was not. This ultrasound was not the best, but it did show exactly what we needed to see -- a healthy baby that is growing on target with a healthy heartbeat.

I labeled in case any one was looking at the photo wondering what exactly they were looking at!

This measurement showed 9w1d, but if the dot of measurement is slightly off, it will take away or add a few days so the 9w1d is completely within reason. 

Measurement was 9w4d

It is completely a wives tale but supposedly, the slower the heartbeat, means a boy (130-140) and a girl is higher (150-160).  But with anything, sometimes it is true and sometimes it isn't but it is fun to play the guessing game. The only guarantee is when the baby emerges-- then you know 100% what sex the baby is! :)

In true IF fashion, when he heard the heartbeat of the baby, he quickly sent me a video of a song that has the same beats per minute!  This is totally hilarious to me that he chose this song but when I told them that their baby was moving around like crazy, he knew this was the perfect song for this heart beat!   Not only that, but we had ONE embryo.  One little sole embryo that we were hoping would hang out.  This little embryo truly is a survivor and even better -- it is a baby now!  So amazing how quickly it is growing!

This is the sound waves from the baby's heartbeat.

With all of this great news, it means that by Thursday (10 weeks), I will be completely finished with weaning.  That means no more chalky suppositories and panty liners during the hot sweaty summer.  No more bruised butt.  Hopefully soon the numbness will go away and I will be able to feel my butt cheek again soon! 

Aside from that, i have lost a few lbs since getting pregnant (I had a few to lose) but my doctor wanted me to get a hold of my nausea so she did give something for nausea in addition to the B6 I am already using.  I am hoping once the extra hormones are out of my system from the supplements, it will level out and the nausea will be a thing of the past.  It is no fun feeling sick, but I signed up for this.  I knew that I might have a few months of discomfort or illness but that is nothing in comparison for what my IPs get at the end.  So you might see me complain, maybe whine but I don't for a moment regret this!  I am so excited for this journey and I couldn't have been matched with a better 'team' than E & L!  But my nausea has been so bad that sometimes I make food for my family but I am not able to consume it.  Last night was a case of this.  I made a homemade pizza with homemade BBQ sauce, steak slices, caramelized onions and cheese.  It probably would have been very good, but I just couldn't eat it.  The only thing I could eat was crackers and cheese.  I got in the shower and when I got out, my husband and oldest kids were not at the apartment.  He went to sonics and got me a huge banana split and it was the most amazing thing I have eaten in a while!  Not healthy, but it was good!

So next up are some photos and info about this gestation.  I take them right from a few different pregnancy tracker apps!  I like sharing so that everyone knows what is going on with the baby and what is going on physically with me. 

This is the size of the baby during the 3rd month between weeks 9-13

Recommended testing for this gestation

Info about the baby at week 9

What is going on with me during week 9

The chance of me posting again before late next week or even later is slim.  We are moving this weekend and will need to get our house established and internet for our new place! So if I am quiet for a bit, it is just because we are busy setting up house and getting the kids acclimated with the new house, registering them for school, getting me established with the new doctors/hospital!  I will check in as soon as humanly possible!