Livin' on a prayer!

If you want to see the connection with the title of this blog-- you are going to have to read it all the way through.  And with history repeating itself, I am long winded and you should expect this one to be long too!  I write a lot not only to explain things, but also for those who only know me through the blog, they can get to know who I am because I am carrying their grandchild, niece or nephew, future godchild, best friend's baby-- whatever the case may be, at least you will get to know the person from afar that is carrying this precious cargo for a few months.

I wanted to post something over the weekend but I started having some bleeding scares....So I opted not to post anything because I was just uncertain and didn't want to jinx anything or misinform.  (My IPs were aware of this as was my agency coordinator).We went out for dinner on Friday and came home and I just felt like I needed to go check and sure enough, I was spotting. I took it easy and remained on the couch for the rest of the weekend.  What else did we have to do other than take it easy?  We had tropical storm Ana hitting the shores so all we had was a lot of rain!

But I was nervous-- who wouldn't be?  Something about carrying a child for another couple brings out the worry wort in me!  I never worried during my own pregnancies.  But like watching someone elses child, you are much more aware of what is going on!  So with the bleeding, it brought worry.




This is something I posted in the past on my other surrogacy blog-- but the same sentiments hold true-- I will feel better when...

• I will feel better when we find out the quality of the embryos after the thaw.
• I will feel better when I get my first positive pregnancy test.
• I will feel better when the lines get darker.
• I will feel better when the test line gets as dark as the control line.
• I will feel better when I have a positive normal beta.
• I will feel better when I have a beta with a doubling time of 48 hours.
• I will feel better when I see the baby on ultrasound.
• I will feel better when I see the baby's heartbeat on ultrasound.
• I will feel better when I make it out of the first trimester.
• I will feel better when everything looks normal on the anatomy scan.
• I will feel better when I make it to viability.
• I will feel better when I make it to 32 weeks because the baby has an excellent chance of being healthy.
• I will feel better when baby reaches full term.
• I will feel better when the baby is born safely and into his or her mother & father's arms.
• I will feel better when the baby is released from the hospital to go home.
• I will feel better when I have enough milk that the family has a nice stash.

Sunday was Mother's Day and we didn't do a lot but I had planned to take my oldest daughter Leah to a painting class that night so I thought it would be okay to go do that since I would be sitting most of the night even in class.  We had the whole studio to ourselves and this was a fun time just to spend with me and Leah.  Here are the paintings we did-

These are all of the duty stations we have been to since we have been married.

This is where Leah's grandparents all live.  G-dog is my dad (he thinks he is too young to be called a grandpa!), Grandma and Grandpa are Kurt's parents and Pappy Cary and Nonnie are my godparents and we are actually moving close to them next month!

 I had called the clinic and they told me to take it easy, pelvic rest and no picking anything up more than 10 lbs until my ultrasound which was today.  My Clinic coordinator called me yesterday and said that 60% of her IVF patients actually have bleeding around this gestation and it does not affect the outcome of the cycle-- just one of those things that are the norm of IVF.  I knew this, I knew that SCH (blood pockets between the placenta and the uterine wall) are common, but you always hope that it won't happen to you!

Today I went for the scan and the tech wouldn't tell me much of anything.  She did not tell me if I have a SCH.  She also would not do the transvaginal ultrasound and only did the abdominal ultrasound.  The transvaginal usually give better views and more accurate measurements especially this early in the pregnancy when the baby is somewhere between a grain of rice and blueberry.

This is what the 6week ultrasound looks like on the app that I follow -- basically a little blob. 

So the tech did say that the baby has a heart rate of 124 and that it is measuring 6w1d on one view and 6w2d on the other view.  Which we are about 6w5d so that is perfect.  Measurements are probably slightly off due to the abdominal ultrasound and having a bit more fat/skin/muscles to view this through.  Aside from that, I have to wait for more information at my OB appointment on Thursday.

SO here are some photos but some of my friends have asked -- 'Is that two yolk sacs?' 'Why is the baby on the left of the gestational sac, then on the right of the gestational sac?'  I don't know but the lady only said one baby so I am sticking with that!  These are all abdominal views.  The nurse coordinator from the clinic called and she said that she was pleased that they were able to get good views and actually measure the heartbeat abdominally since we are so early and that its a good sign that all of the measurements could be obtained like this! and she also remarked how lucky I am to have my IPs.  I definitely feel very blessed!!

  So here are the pictures-- I labeled the best I could for what stuff is!

This is where the tech measured the heart rate.

This is a close up of the image in the heart rate scan.  If you look to the left of the line, there looks like a black circle, a bit to the left of that, by the edge of the gestational sac, there is another black circle -- some have suggested that it looks like two yolk sacs?!  I don't really know. I am still sticking with ONE baby :)

Due Date is New Years Eve -- With any luck, I will make it through Christmas at home!  Heart Rate is 124 beats per minute

So now that you have hung with me this long-- what does this song have to do with this blog or this situation?

Well apparently this little teacup has channeled their inner Bon Jovi-- That song also has 124 bpm!  How do I know this?  My amazing IPs are sending me youtube videos that channel their baby so they know the speed their little baby's heart is beating!   I told a friend their response and she dug up her inner 80's goddess (aquanet, leg warmers, blue eye shadow and all) and dubbed this baby Tommy Gina-- I surround myself with the most wonderful and hilarious people! 

Also it helps that through all of this-- we are all living on a prayer!  Many people are praying for us all over the world-- keep them coming, they really seem to be working!

More information on Thursday after my appointment-- though I think my OB will just say 'Everything looks great!' because well... everything looks great!